letter to a friend lost in doubt

man with wings standing on brown mountain peak

Photo by Rakicevic Nenad on Pexels.com

We have all been there

In the fog

No judgement here

I watch you struggling for clarity

Arguing against solutions

Your mouth opens and shuts in concert with your mind

Your fabulous questing mind now steeped in confusion

Refusing the light you no longer trust

But I tell you, my friend

Everybody suffers

Everybody falls

You were not singled out for crucifixion

You believe because you are brilliant life should be easier

The path smooth

The benefactors lining up

But even the greatest minds struggle to convince the mob of the mountaintop

I tell you, dear friend

Disappointments are the chaff of life

The potholes on the exhausted common

The road less travelled is steep and hard and you will stumble and fall

If you are honest you will admit you chose the climb over the plane

When you were young and vigorous and full of energy

You donned your intellectual armour and charged your visionary steed

And off you rode

Alone

Full of optimism and certainty

Bravely charting unexplored psychological terrain

Now you feel betrayed and unsupported and rail against the gradient

I am sorry you are exhausted

I am sorry no-one sees what you do

But I am even sorrier that you cannot see how far you’ve come

This plateau where you catch your breath is shrouded in fog

And hiding in this miasma you tell yourself stories

Of deceit, betrayal, lies and liars

But these enemies, real or imagined, are cycling their small lives in the valley below

Collaring their neighbours with exaggerated tales of an imagined view

Do not populate the plateau with their ghosts

When the fog lifts the light will dissolve their phantoms

And you will rise again

Alone

The mountaintop is calling you

Heed her siren song

Ignore these doubts that circle your sanity like vultures

Think of the sun, my friend, still shining behind the fog

And reach for her

I know you are tired

I know failure creeps into your bones like ague

I know you have lost all hope

But this slow saturation will drown you in spiralling conversations that drag you down

You rail against the solitude of the climb, the lack of applause

But at the top you will see rising suns, waning moons, traversing stars and God

And when you return to the valley shining and star-dusted

You will bring the universe to the doubters

Who will creep from their burrows and ask you about the sun

Even your enemies will balm your singed wings, Icarus

And some may even make the climb themselves

Inspired by you

Stand now

The longer you sit here swathed in dragon’s breath 

The harder it will be to find the path

You will stiffen and grow moss

Fuse into stone and become footfall for someone else’s climb

Be brave

Facing the light is hard

The sudden blinding glare reveals both loss and hope

The mountains become molehills, the lions merely moles

These monsters looming large in the fog are phantoms

You say nobody understands the danger you are in

And to an extent you’re right

Nobody  sees your monsters but you

Reclaim your sanity, dear friend, and stand

Clarity of mind is fearful in its revelation

But dragon’s breath is death by another name

Rise, dear friend, and resume the path

There really is nowhere else to go but up.

 

 

5 thoughts on “letter to a friend lost in doubt

  1. Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I find
    It really useful & it helped me out a lot. I hope to give something back and aid others like you aided me.

    Like

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